Play can also be a helpful tool for working through difficult feelings. Sometimes you feel like you need my help.” Close suggests trying the following: “You are learning to do so many big boy things. Try to show them that you notice the regressive behavior without shaming them. Let them know that they are safe and supported. How can parents help support their children through regressions? Usually parents get to know your child’s patterns of moving forward and then needing to move backward a little bit.” Regression is also very common when children are adjusting to new situations, like becoming an older sibling or going to pre-school for the first time. “I think children vary in terms of what causes them to regress and the regressive patterns they seem to exhibit. “I see some children who may regress right before they’re about to make a big leap forward, or they regress right after they’ve made a leap forward,” says Close. In fact, it is to be expected and it’s very helpful to further development – think of it as your child’s way of preparing themselves for taking on more responsibility. A baby may be a bit clingier, need to feed more, be a bit whinier or cry more often than usual. If there is regression in an infant it might not necessarily be as evident. You will typically see regressive behaviours in toddlers and preschoolers, but it can really happen at any age – even with infants and older children. “All of a sudden, your child cannot do what they could do before,” explains Close. If a child has achieved something like getting dressed by herself, you may see a loss of some of those skills.
You may see more temper tantrums, difficulty with sleeping or eating or reverting to more immature ways of talking. Regression can vary, but in general, it is acting in a younger or needier way. “So, when those stumbling blocks come along the progressive path of development, it can feel really overwhelming and cause some kind of regression in children,” explains Close. For example, a baby learning to walk may be delighted by the new skill she has mastered, but may also realize that mom and dad are now further away or that she could fall down. However, along with the excitement of being able to do new things comes stress. There is a natural energy in children to explore, manipulate and master their world.” “Most children have a very strong urge to move forward in their development (progression). “I like to pair regression with the idea of progression,” says Close. We spoke to Nancy Close, PhD, an Assistant Professor at the Child Study Center at the Yale School of Medicine and Associate Director of the Yale Program in Early Childhood Education, about what causes regression to happen and how you can help your child through it. Regression is common in growing children – especially toddlers. If you have noticed that your child has taken a giant leap forward (like finally mastering toilet training!) only to then take a step back (refusing to use the toilet!), you are not alone.
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